you told me to be honest with myself and to be honest with others. ive heard those words before - and ive heard those words before from your mouth -- but it never hit me so hard.
i would consider myself a very honest person - but have realized over the past few weeks that being dishonest to yourself can turn into perceived dishonesty with others.
i was raised to "not say anything if its not nice at all". this phrase which was first brought to my attention from Thumper in the disney cartoon Bambi - and was reinforced throughout my childhood and young adulthood by my family and the people around me. being the compassionate soul that i am, i was always so afraid to express the feelings i had when treated negatively by others because of this. even until a couple months ago, i would hold this hurt inside in fear of letting the other persons feelings be hurt over mine. even typing this out makes me feel so incredibly lame - and incredibly stupid.
guilt is something that will not hold me down anymore. i never want to put myself through this pain again - and will proclaim it right then and there what im thinking and what im feeling. life is too short not to feel good -- and i need to make more room in my life for good and great things.
No comments:
Post a Comment